Your Online Dating Profile - How To Present Yourself Online ? at Online Dating Guide

Your Online Dating Profile - How To Present Yourself Online ? February 1, 2007

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For many people, the hardest part of starting to date online is figuring out what to put in their profile, which poses many questions for most people. What do I say ? Where do I begin ? Why are they making me do this ? As with most aspects of online dating there are some basic and simple rules that are not necessarily obvious to the newcomer, who has just started finding her/his way through unfamiliar territory.

Many people are keen to start searching for and contacting people as soon as they join a site. As a result, they either leave their profile blank, or write something quickly before beginning their search.

Here are a few points to keep in mind:

1. Write just a short introduction Try to write a profile that is detailed enough to tell people about you, but short enough to leave people wanting more. This is one way of overcoming writer’s block and is perfectly allowable in most online dating services. Its important to deliver a few good and inviting lines with a clear notification to the readers that it is a “work-in-progress”. Even if you receive a healthy number of responses, don’t be tempted to leave your ad unfinished.

2. Search and save prospect’s profiles Don’t waste time checking out the competition. Instead look through your prospect’s profiles and gather useful information on how to write generally. You will develope a sound sense of the site’s use of explicit language, acceptable length, style, etc. More importantly, however, you’ll discover those characteristics your most desired prospects are looking for in a potential date or mate. And please don’t forget to save those profiles you find most interesting for later contact.

3. Be yourself It’s easy to lie when writing a profile, but more difficult to follow through once you meet someone. If your profile says you’re 6′4″ when you really 5′11″, your cover will be blown as you turn up for your date. Also, starting a relationship with a lie is a sure way to get off to a bad start. If you want to attract a likeminded person, you have to be honest about who you are, your hobbies and interests etc.

Â 4. Tailoring your profile and language It is commonly agreed that, honestly is the best policy ! Having said that; it is also important to “target your market”. Know which species of bee you wish to attract and exactly what field you are planting in! In other words don’t talk “leather and whips” when you looking for true romance at “Buddhist Buddies Online”.

5. Don’t be demanding Many people use their profiles to list the qualities they would like their ideal match to have. There is nothing wrong with that, but make sure you balance this with information abour yourself. You don’t want to come across as writing a ransom note.

6. Freely express your interest and values When discussing those aspects of life, which turn you on, whether it’s a value, like having a family, or an interest, like skydiving, don’t be afraid to include the whys and wherefores. Use descriptive and emotive language, for example, “that first jump filled me with a profound sense of freedom.” Firstly, you will be allowing a prospect, doing a search of “skydiving”, to locate you. Secondly, you may be giving the prospect a powerful subliminal message that you don’t want to be “possessed”.

7. Too much information Avoid mentioning past disappointments and bad break-ups in your profile; this is not what the space is for. Think: do you really want this to be the first thing people see when they look you up? Don’t let yourself be defined by negatives aspects of your personality and bad experieces of the past.

8. Talk about yourself positively in subtle ways Too often, personal essays or profiles become nothing but tedious list of “I” or “Me” statements. Instead, find ways to inject information about your achievements, desires, and future goals, casually, through short anecdotes, reflections and humor. It helps to keep your “ideal match” in mind and write to him/her as if in direct conversation. Adding an audio file, whenever possible, is especially important because all the information your prospect has received so far has been visual. A short audio file can enhance, authenticate, and supplement your well-executed and masterfully written essay. images44.jpg

Â 9. Make it funny Using humour is good way to liven up a profile and give people a glimpse into your personality. Some of the most successful profiles are the ones that simply make people laugh. Including a joke you find funny is good, as long as you make sure you write something about yourself in the profile as well.

10. Upload a picture Not having a photo on your profile will make many people ignore you completely. Some people even specify in their search that they only want to speak to people whose picture appears on the site. Don’t worry about your looks. Different people have different tastes and not everyone expects to meet movie star or supermodel online. A clear headshot of you smiling is all it takes to seriously increase the amount of responses you get.

11. A few things to avoid with a veangeance Some individuals are uneasy with writing about themselves and thus feel the need to apologize to the reader. Don’t be one of them ! In fact don’t apologize for anything whatsoever. Remember, “you are a child of the universe and you have a right to be here”. Just try not to tell your entire life story.

12. Be consistent Make sure your profile, your screen name and your picture all match the impression you want to give. If you are a woman looking for a serious relationship, calling yourself “SexKitten” and uploading a semi-nude picture of yourself, is not likely to attract the kind of man you’re looking for. A man looking for a wife, should probably not use a username that hints about how good he is in bed.

Remember : your profile is the first (and often last) impression you will make to potential online matches. Make it count.

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